This is the third article in a sequence called A Life of Less Liberty, which is a series of four short pieces written by Jeremy reflecting on his 27 years of wrongful incarceration.
“I wanted to write about the social dimension of my
imprisonment and explain how things have changed for me since coming to
prison. In my late teens I was very
lucky to have an older sister who in the late ’70’s was a very beautiful and
popular model. Sheila and her modelling mates took me under their wings and
showed me around London’s glitzy night clubs on many enjoyable evenings. I
think they saw me as a little mascot and I made them laugh and they felt safe
with me, even today I’m still in touch with some of them. As the New Romantic
era in music came into fashion I was doing A Levels at Colchester Technical
College and I seemed to mix with all the trendy girls most of the time as I was
never a ‘beer with the lads’ kind of bloke. I always had lots of gay friends
too though I’d mix easily with the young farmers locally, my friends generally
were from a wide circle. I feel upset
that I have missed out on all of their weddings, birthday parties, Christenings
and watching them become good parents or celebrate a change of career, and I’ve
even been denied the mourning process of saying goodbye at funerals. I have
missed all the key times in their lives as I’ve not been able to share so many
things with them, or protect them when they were afraid, or comfort them when
they were hurt, just to be there for my friends at any time of the day or night
when they needed a kind word or listening ear.
At the prison there is just a concrete yard to walk
around but I enjoy visits from friends on the outside and it’s great to catch
up on how everyone is doing. When friends are happy that’s easy of course but
when they have a crisis that’s when I feel it as I’m unable to help them in a
tangible way. So I am left feeling
useless as a friend and powerless which is tough. I have friends who are the
same age as my nephews Nicholas and Daniel and it’s always heartbreaking
thinking about the lives they live and thinking about the boys doing the same
had their lives not been cut short in the tragedy. But I also love the
enthusiasm for life that my younger friends have – the career opportunities now
are worldwide and available to anyone who works hard and wants it enough.
When I still had my liberty I used to go to the
gym, not as frequently as I do now but I liked to keep fit and working on the
farm also naturally helped to keep me strong. Being healthy is something you
don’t think about when you are younger but coping with the stress of coming to
prison as an innocent man has been difficult. One of the great ways to help with
pressure is by going to the gym, whatever type of activity you’re into it makes
a huge difference. The prison regime encourages sport and sports training. I’ve
done many different activities over the years including football and other team
games but I really do prefer to lift weights rather than aerobic exercise. I am
dedicated to my gym sessions which are really enjoyable and another way of
stress relief is through yoga, and this is something I learnt in prison a long
time ago through classes and I’ve continued to use it since then, it makes up
part of my physical therapy routine to keep supple, centre myself in difficult
times, and it adds to my overall wellbeing because prison is a naturally
stressful environment.
I have of course made friends inside prison and I
remember doing time in Gartree with Yusef
Abdullahi one of the Cardiff three wrongly convicted for the murder of
Lynette White. Yusef was a very nice man and a great friend at the time which
is why I was upset by his tragic death last year. I felt the injustice of the time
in prison which he had lost as a result of his wrongful conviction. We used to
share our thoughts about what life would be like when our convictions were
overturned and I know at that time neither of us would have believed that his
freedom would be taken by his early death and that I would still be
convicted even now.”
Jeremy
© There is no objection to any material on this website being reproduced free of charge, but it should be credited to this web address copyright of "Jeremy Bamber Campaign."
© There is no objection to any material on this website being reproduced free of charge, but it should be credited to this web address copyright of "Jeremy Bamber Campaign."